Stop (Hammer Time) Motion writing

Blog number 2! I think the first one was alright? It did the trick anyway, I managed to figure out some sort of short for the CGI Animation genre. This week I have until Thursday night to write a short for Stop Motion animation. I may or may not write any of it today. I could end up writing more of my murder mystery comedy with the title I love "The Evil-Doers Get Together Massacre". Or I might continue creating a new house in The Sims (Oh yes I almost forgot I am brilliant at creating houses in those games! I'm still proud of my reading room within one house that had a tree growing in the middle of it. An Elf's dreamhouse!)

Anyway, I might split this blog into three sections. A review of the short I wrote last week, the current genre challenge and finally general stuff.

SECTION ONE: HERB (HAL 9000's friendly cousin)

That's not actually him!

I ended up writing a short about a friendly computer program (called HERB) who was found on an abandoned ship. We learn the computer "had to get rid of" the crew when their were problems on board. A mercenary has been searching for the crew, wanting to kill them (as mercenaries do) so is happy to hear they are dead. HERB then tells him he did not actually kill them but instead jettisoned them in escape hatches. The mercenary convinces the computer program to help find the crew. HERB agrees as if he didn't then the ship, and it, would be left to drift through space alone forever, however when the mercenary leaves the conversation, HERB deletes its own navigational system, saying goodbye to his friends, the crew.

I thought it was fun! HERB even sang! I think it'd be a cool story to sort of reverse 2001: A Space Odyssey. HERB would be trying to rescue the crew, not hurt them. Maybe there is a longer story here about mercenaries on the ship who want to use HERB to find the old crew, and HERB has to find a way to stop them, but not hurt them!

Three Laws of Robotics might be really cool obstacles for HERB to have to overcome in his mission to protect his friends.

Now someone pay me money to write the feature and if you can call Daniel Radcliffe and let him know he should voice HERB that would be great!

SECTION TWO: Stop! Or My Motion Mom Will Shoot!

I'll be honest now I think I should just use all of the Funko Pop Figures I got and write a spoof version of the only movie to give Sylvester Stallone an Oscar nomination!

I think, I dunno...I assume it did!

I think I'd like to write something I can actually film myself. Something Celine will help me film too. We have some teddy bears and the mentioned Funko pop figures here too. Or maybe I might get some googly eyes and stick them onto some stuff? I remember watching Brave Little Toaster when I was young so I could make some sort of version of that with household objects as living things?

When I think of stop motion I think of comedies movies like The Fantastic Mr. Fox. I wonder would it be more interesting to take it far away from comedy. Horror? Yesterday I spotted the news that there are plans for an American remake of Train to Busan.

(This reminds me to write a script called "Bus to Trainan" someday)

So, horror, could we do a stop motion horror movie involving household objects? What I might have to think on is how to make these characters interesting enough that if one was to "die", a reader would feel bad for them. Or if they live then we all cheer "yay".

The googly eyes are great though. I also will need to think of what the threat exactly is. Zombies doesn't really work does it? Our cats probably won't be great actors either. I remember the characters in the previously mentioned toaster movie all went on their journey to find their owner who had moved. I could try something like that?

I still have 4 days to work on it. At least I have my star locked in!

SECTION THREE: I saved a fly from coke overdose (not the drugs)

OK, the last title isn't relevant to anything other than what happened five minutes ago. I feel that sort of title might be a common theme in my blogging. Tweet me if you need more info on that story.

I'm currently writing the murder mystery I mentioned at the top of this. I'm about 25 pages into the story and think it's coming across better than the first, sort of first draft, of it. I don't outline, well unless I'm allowed to count a first draft as an outline?, so this big ensemble cast all trying to figure out who killed who and what's going on is a very fun headache to have to write. I love the mix of weird characters, all supervillains ,so I want to make sure I give them all some time to shine. I'm going to list the characters for my own amusement, plus I would like to think an actor would find at least one they would like to play as if this was ever filmed.

THE EVIL-DOERS

Hench-Queen: Leader of the group. An old supervillain who has the power to create butler clones. In her old ae these clones keep dying due to heart attacks and spontaneous combustion and there is reasonable evidence to suggest Hench-Queen has gone totally insane.

Illusion-Master: Number two in the group. .As his name suggests, a master of illusion and someone who is trying to hold the new group of supervillains together. He's loyal to the leader but does also think he probably would do a better job than her.

Det. John Parker: Former superhero and greatest detective in the world. Now ranked 107th and kicked off the hero team. He joins the Evil-Doers at their secret mansion on the request of Hench-Queen to find the murderer amongst the group.

Emenaza: A Mexican drug cartel boss from Inchigaggin, County Cork. Ireland. This clearly, 100% Irish farmer has been claiming he's Mexican for years since, "Mexican drug cartel boss" is a more impressive position written on a CV than "Sold drugs outside the pub in BallyHooly a few times".

Spy-Lord: World's most famous spy with multiple reality TV shows and a talk show of his own. He loves the celebrity lifestyle and all of the fame and is too vain to see that this level of fame makes it impossible for him to actually spy anymore.

Kelly: A psychotic killer who recently got married to Barry and insisted she join him on the island. Barry is actually not a supervillain but works as EMEA content reviewer for a fast food company even though he never eats fast food (LOL). They are so loved up it's making the others sick to their stomach.

Final Foe: The greatest assassin in the world. A ferocious fighter blessed with a brilliant strategic mind and expert hand to hand combat abilities. She is practically unbeatable. Her powers come from a curse placed on her by an old mysterious man. Unfortunately this old man was mysterious about everything except being an old fashioned creep, so by transforming this soldier into her "Final Foe" version it also made her into a hip swaying, hair swishing sex icon. Her outfits now completely impractical but attention grabbing. She hates this nonsense as she fights her legs from strutting like a Victoria Secret model when she moves.

Hungry Hippo: Body of a woman, head of a hippo, manners of a stranger who will treat you as their new best friend. Her Dutch friend just got engaged and she loves nothing more than puns and a smidgen of gossip!

Senator Dean Bwiney: May be based on a particularly laughable South Carolina politician who I once saw on TV practically cry and beg that he needed more money. Dean will talk about how he is on the front line fighting and then cower a minute later. Like any self respecting politician does.

Pi: Killer robot that I think is going to have to come to accept that he probably won't be ble to kill all humanity. It really gets him down because he's able to download the daily humanity birth and death rates and always get upset by the numbers. If someone could blow up a hospital it would really give the poor maniacal robot a lift!

Darkminder: A master ninja who is very loud, dresses in lime, pink and orange gear. He barges his way past people and loudly declares he's being stealthy.

Decadence: A normal knife wielding guy who everyone in the world hates. You know when someone says "oh that guy is the worst guy in the world". This is actually him. Decadence is actually the worst guy in the world. Someone has to be. This man is. I'm not even sure why but he makes people despise him so much just by his presence.

Now-Woman: She's a hyperactive supervillain who can time travel. Really chatty but if you ask her how does she time travel she will bore you to death with a never-ending explanation of every single detail involved in how to time travel. Nobody who has tried to learn it form her has succeeded as everyone ends up running away from her. If Decadence is the worst person in the world, she is the most insufferable.

They are my gang. I guess it's Knives Out meets Suicide Squad. I'm certain things will change a lot before I have a readable draft ready but I do like my plan for the ending of it all. Celine likes murder mysteries so I said I'd write on and let her figure out who the murderer is. I think I've a good mystery going here with plenty of twists.

That's my plans anyway. Now to watch sports for the rest of the day!

Thanks for reading

Kevin