What to do as a writer with $15,000

Hello again

And I say again because I have had to rewrite this blog. Unfortunately my laptops keyboard stopped working and I had to restart it. I thought that what I had written was saved but it doesn't seem to be.

Oh well, we'll live through it.

So today's blog is a list blog. Hooray! It's inspired from a twitter thread I read about mentors, teachers and things us writers would love to come help us with our writing.

I read about one program which sells itself on it's ability to position writers as a world-class authority, allow writers to easily find & befriend dream (famous people!) colleagues, make industry insiders want your screenplays and come to you and be the ultimate man that EVERY woman CRAVES!

Woops, sorry, ignore that last point. That came from a very different website.

Anyway. The writer stuff. That site listed a program to help writers at costing just shy of $15,000. A mere pittance to us non-peasants. However I would prefer to spend that pocket change on other activities. I think they might help me become a better writer, write a better story, and have some fun in my life too. I just am not convinced giving $15,000 to anyone is going to guarantee me results. Now a disclaimer: I might be poking fun at the idea of the program but on a more serious note, I don't have any issue with it. It's not for me. If it's for anyone else then seriously good luck to them. The people charging this amount are alright by me. I have nothing against them. So I'm not blogging to bash them.

I am here to blog about how to spend our spare $15,000

So here are some idea. Please note, I assume all of us will be flying out from Ireland? Got it? Got your money with you? OK great.

OPTION ONE: TRANS-SIBERIAN RAILWAY

(If you could complete Act 1 by the time we get to Perm please)

For those of us who aren't familiar with this. It is the longest railway line in the world. Over 9,289 kilometers (5,772 miles), from the Russian capital Moscow, the largest to Vladivostok, which is next to the Sea of Japan. There are other options. We could go to Beijing or Mongolia but I'm going to stick with this route just because I heard about this first. But if you want to go the other routes then have at it, just be warned, YMMV (See I only use abbreviations literally)

So on our trip. flight from Dublin to Moscow is going to cost us approx. $120 and I think we need to account for one night in Moscow before hopping aboard a train. That would be another $250 or thereabouts for a lovely stay in a 5 star hotel.

At this point I am going to note there are tensions in the world with the Ukraine crisis and Russia - NATO but let's pretend they don't exist right now.

Let's get on the train. $12,100 will get you onto FIRST CLASS and taking through 15 days of a trip across Russia. The tour here also includes full board. So food is sorted for us. Actually, we also are getting a night stay in Moscow and Vladivostok for that price too. Although I might personally go for the 5 star hotel option I bought for myself. Once there we will have to spend approx. $350 dollars for a flight back to Ireland. So at this point we will have spent $12,700 was spent to travel across Russia. With $2,300 left for drinks and renewing our memberships to Final Draft or Writers Duet.

I would argue that travelling across a vast scenic area like Russia should get the creativity flowing. I guess it'd be obvious to say we could write a new Murder On The Orient Express. I think just looking out the window and spotting the incredible view should stir some ideas.

OPTION TWO: VISIT AUSTIN (THE FILM FESTIVAL, NOT STONE COLD STEVE)

(There's a cowboy hat so I'm 4000% certain this is the correct festival picture)

Now that we are back from the train trip. It just so happens we found another $15,000 in our other pocket. So why not meet plenty and plenty and plenty of other filmmakers? Cannes might be a little too pricey it seems but instead, let's go to Austin Texas. You might notice on Twitter, but every year you can figure out when the festival is on because a few weeks before it, lots and lots of writers get very excited about going and meeting other people. So, since all of us writers are famously extrovert and social Hercules's, we should go to. Now to get to Austin, the flight to and from is going to cost us approx. 550 dollars. When we get there, I am going to just pick everything on the menu Buy myself a Producers Badge, be interested in Podcast Programming, interested in Playwriting Programming, interested in New Media

Pitch Competition Ticket. Grab myself an Awards Luncheon Ticket. A single) Film & Food Party Ticket. And why not Bring myself a Friend to Film & Food Party. I'll just easily make a friend at the festival since half of writing twitter will be there and bring them along to that.

All of that will set me back just under $1000. I guffaw at such low costs! And BTW, I am probably going to hang out in Austin for about 2 weeks so I will check myself into a 5 star hotel here. This one seems OK. That's another $4,000.

That's just over $5,500 spent. Now remember, when there let's network, make friends and if we can do it expertly, steal that story idea from the writer who went on some $15,000 writing program!

OPTION 3:

(If you don't like this picture then get out!)

First off I had to have a look to make sure we spent $15,000 on an ethical wildlife adventure. No point wasting money on an activity with animals being taken advantage of. So if we are going to fly over to Finland to Hetta Huskies farm, we might as well make sure it's OK to do so.

Let's get there! So the farm is located within the arctic circle. We are probably going to have to travel from Dublin to Rovaniemi which will be approx. $450 for a return ticket. For a hotel stay in the area for a week you will probably have to spend up to $1000 so keep that loose change handy for that. Onto the farm itself.

There is a multi day wilderness and tundra safari tour, ranging from 5 to 8 days. This is in the price range of $1800 - $2000 but we can cancel the hotel stay then during the time with the dogs. We would be helping with feeding and other dog-related tasks on the farm. Staying on the farm homestead and in wilderness cabins while there. Also there are activities other than wandering out. Snowmobile tours, farm feeding and agility course. I think that last one is meant for the huskies but we could get in a bit of exercise anyway.

Oh and there is an aurora chasing by dogsled activity. I mean, it seems like we either go and are too creatively barren to think of anything to write, or else we realize writing is not that important and just live there forever taking care of animals!

(Doctor Strange needs to close that ASAP)

Again, this seems like something you could do for under $5000.

Oh...and might pop into stay at the Snow Castle.

Just pop into there. No need for anymore explanation.

(Not very cool is it?)

By the way you can also donate to the farm here. I did only because I can't adopt this cool looking guy!

OPTION 4: VISIT MIDDLE-EARTH

If you're looking for inspiration in creating an epic world for an epic story, we could look down the back of my golden couch and find $15,000 and go on this awesome Red Carpet Tours Flights over to New Zealand will be about $1300. Once there I would suggest planning to spend a week not on tour. So save another $1300 for a week in a 5 star hotel.

Now onto Middle-Earth:

Here's the cool 14 day itinerary. Some locations you walk along are sites of Hobbiton, Edoras, Pelannor Fields and dine in the Green Dragon. You can kayak down the river that the hobbits escaped down in barrels. Climb up to Edoras. Visit WETA workshops. Oh and a picnic lunch on the way to Mt. Ruapehu and the sites of Mordor, Emyn Muil and Mt Doom

This 14 day tour is costing roughly $5,100 so with that plus flights plus a week in a 5 star hotel that is in total = $7,700. Just over half of the price of the mentorship program. Cool.

OPTION 5: VISIT FRIENDS

(Friends picture not found :'( )

Most people I know who are writers or filmmakers of any description are people I have spoken to online. So, maybe I could use that meager $15,000 to visit them. I could start a challenge to visit multiple people and ask them to help add to a story I write. Or feck, just write about the journey. I'm going to note I am talking about multiple flights to multiple countries. Make it as far reaching as I can. For this one it's going to be personal to your own friends circle but I'm calculating roughly $1,600 for six different flights. Now, I haven't budgeted hotel stays but I think with $13,400 to spare I can afford some friends couches or hotel rooms.

I just don't see how actually hanging out with fellow film loving friends isn't going to make me happier than a program with someone I don't know.

It's not lost on me that you could even do more than one option for under $15,000. Maybe check your back pocket for an extra thousand just for extra chocolate money. I would like to think experiencing options like that might make be worth considering. It might inspire more than plenty of zoom meetings. I'm certain the mentorships are beneficial and friendly conversations, but I think I would look back on that time in Lapland feeding huskies or the time passing alongside the Sea of Japan as opposed to those nice zoom meetings.